He didn’t believe me

unsupportiveI remember it was late at night, we were driving home from a family day out – we were all tired, the kids had fallen asleep in the back of the car.

I began to talk about my business. I felt the atmosphere shift in the car from a relaxed, sleepy comfort to tangible tension.

I mentioned a new project and my expectation for it’s success. He shrugged. I tried to explain my reasoning and give more details. He didn’t respond, no engagement, a noncommittal sigh.

It started with a knot in my throat, my eyes stinging and then anger rising from the pit of my stomach.

I don’t understand it, I said, why don’t you believe me. Nothing that I said I would do over the last 3 years, I let fail. I said I’d start the business and I did. I said I’d write a book and it happened, I said it would get to bestseller and it did. I said I’d make money and I am.

That’s when his eyebrows raised. Okay, I know it’s not much I said but at least it’s a start.

He took his eyes off the road for a moment and looked at me. It’s not that I don’t believe in you, he said, it’s just that without seeing the results it’s really hard for me to get excited about the projections.

I mean, it’s great that you’ve done all that, but you’re not making serious money and I’m just not sure you ever will.

It hit like a punch. I was devastated that he couldn’t see my vision. But worse than that, I knew he was right. I was not making serious money and I was also afraid that I never would.

That was the moment that shifted everything.

I knew I had a choice.

I could give it all up. Realize that it was futile, that the majority of entrepreneurs and coaches don’t succeed, I was no different to them. I’d given it a good run, I’d tried, it was time to cut my losses and go get a job.

Or I could get really serious about my business, take a close look at what was working and do more of that. And identify where I was draining my energy and resources, and stop that! I knew that I could sharpen up my vision and get into consistent action to make that vision come alive.

That was the moment that I decided that it was time to prove to him (and more importantly to myself!) that I could really do this. I had spent enough time measuring my success by the contacts I reached, potential clients I had met and the inspired marketing efforts I had begun.

It was time to get more clients and start measuring my success by the increase in income and profit that my business could make.

Here are 5 tangible things I did to make this happen:

  1. Time Management – stopped wasting time on less productive activities like checking email, social media and surfing websites by other people in the industry (comparison is never a good thing!)
  2. List Building – actively looked for ways to build my list through promotions, free offers, interviews and article writing.
  3. Creating Community – began my ‘Storyzine’ – writing and sending out stories and resources to my community every week (I’ve done this now religiously for years!)
  4. Speaking Opportunities – sourced suitable places to speak about story coaching – telesummits/interviews, webinars and conferences (where I applied to do workshops and breakout sessions wherever I could!)
  5. Offered my Services – set up a funnel to meet with people for consultations and offer my programs and services – it’s amazing what happens when you get clear on what exactly you offer and then encourage people to actually sign up!

Now it didn’t happen immediately, most overnight successes are about 10 years in the making as far as I can see! But my business began to consistently grow and expand with more clients, more programs and more profits.

While I write this I’m flying to an international speaking engagement. He’s sleeping next to me, it was an early start today! He decided to join me for the trip so that he can support me as I run from meeting to keynote session to workshop.

I feel incredibly blessed by the journey that we’ve taken over these last years. The miracles we have witnessed that emerge through hard work, inspired action, courage and love.

He doesn’t doubt my vision anymore. Neither do I.

Where are you struggling to make real your vision?

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2 comments on “He didn’t believe me

  1. I loved this article. My husband doesn’t understand and doesn’t really bellieving in coaching. I have been a very successful freelancer web developer and videographer working from home, and now I have mostly quit in order to work as a coach, and he is almost ungry with me. It is so hard not to have support – or at least the support you would want from your closed ones…

    • Hang in there, be patient, it will come. They only want what’s best for you just sometimes they have different ideas on what that it! best wishes, Lisa

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