People ask me ALL the time.
What is a good story and how do you tell a bad story.
All you have to do is sit down with that person in your life who tells the same story again and again (usually over the dinner table) – you know the one, the story that everyone has heard a million times before. That’s NOT a good story.
I think we all have someone like that in our lives – I got curious about it. I started asking myself and others – why do we tell the same stories over and over?
And I discovered that it’s sometimes because of habit, sometimes because we’re not noticing our lives going by and our ‘new’ stories begin created. Sometimes it’s because the old story is covering something up that we’d really like to be telling but don’t know how.
And still the question so what is a bad story?
A bad story is one that does not serve anyone; not the teller nor the listener. It’s a story that is disempowering, disrespectful and without clarity. A story that does no good in the world.
And a good story – well, a good story has a mission. To help people see possibility, help uncover curiosity and explore the unknown. Ultimately the good story is about creating a space within which people can find themselves.
But let’s go a little deeper.
There are outer stories – the stories we tell others. And there are inner stories – the stories we tell ourselves.
The outer story is what a lot of marketing folks focus on. How to find the story that will connect with your prospective client and knock their socks off. The story that will prove your credibility and help you show up authentically. I’m a huge fan of the outer story. I believe that we all have great stories to share and everyone should make time to discover their outer story – for themselves, their products/services and for their entire business. When you find this story, you can craft it and make it compelling so that it reaches your ideal client and attracts amazing growth in your business. (if you’d like to find out more about this – click here and let me know)
And then there’s the inner story.
This is the story we tell ourselves. And no matter how beautiful, shiny and squeaky-clean our outer story is – if it doesn’t integrate with our inner story – it will feel false. Yes, it’s that powerful. The inner story is how you are really feeling – how you are handling the challenges you face – what you believe is possible for you.
I remember the time my program launch was a disaster and for a few weeks my inner story just kept telling me what a total failure I was. I found it really hard to shift the narrative that made me believe that my business was doomed and everything I had done so far was a waste. That inner story was horrible. And I had to figure out how to shift it. It took a little while and a lot of work but ultimately I managed to get back to a healthy and more empowering inner story.
How? Well, firstly by realizing what a gift the failure had been in terms of what I learned about my market, my ideal client and the offer that I thought would thrill them. It was the opposite of my beliefs and I saw that I had become lazy in understanding what people want and the way they want it – a total gift.
So, on one side you need an outer story that is relevant to your audience, authentic to your experience and makes you feel passionate.
On the other, you need an inner story that empowers you, makes you feel strong, capable and able to acknowledge the talent/gift/beauty you bring to the world in order to serve others.
With these two stories in hand – you are unbeatable and the growth of your business is inevitable.
So, what story do you need to work on right now?
Share it below.