Who are you attracting into your life and your business?
Have you thought about it?
How and why are these people showing up?
I was sitting in a sparsely populated lecture
hall, waiting for the professor to arrive. I
liked getting there early, choosing to sit right
in the middle, about 4 rows back from the front.
A woman arrived just after me and shuffled in
carrying lots of heavy-looking books in her arms.
She sat 3 seats away from me in the row in front.
She put her books down, turned to me and said
“Good morning!” and smiled broadly.
I had noticed her before, paid attention to the
smart comments she gave in class and the quick wit
that I loved and recognized. In that moment, I
knew what I had to do.
“We should be friends,” I said “hi, I’m Lisa and
I’d love to invite you to a party I’m having next
week, you will come, won’t you?”
Over 20 years later, we are still the best of
friends!
This is not the only time I’ve done this, followed
my curiosity or my heart, my passion or my desire
in order to connect with people in the moment.
Sometimes it works wonderfully, sometimes less so!
When you meet someone new, often you get an
instant feeling, good or bad.
Do you act on it?
There is a part of us all that sometimes just
wants to be the little child. We want to go up
to that cool person, the popular one, or the
pretty one, or the smart one and simply say “will you be my friend?”
Why don’t we do it?
We feel a really strong connection and then we run
away.
What’s that about?
Well, there’s always:
“What if they say no?”
“What if they’re really mean underneath the nice
exterior?”
“What if I’m wrong and I get hurt?”
“How can I know for sure that they want to be
friends too?”
The truth is we can’t know for sure. But isn’t it
worth the try?
When we stop ourselves reaching out and instead
act based on our fears of what might happen (or
might not), we are losing touch with that magic
energy that simply connects like with like.
We are drifting from our crystal clear
understanding of what is good for us and what we
know to be true.
Yes, you’re right, sometimes we get it wrong.
Sometimes we’re seduced by something that is not
what it seems. But more often, we are too scared
to reach out and touch what we are clearly meant
to connect with.
The times that I have acted on this impulse and
reached out to connect has created some of the
most meaningful relationships in my life and in my
business.
When you are clear about your desires, intentions
and who you are, when you know your story, it’s
easy to connect in a meaningful way.
When you show interest in others, you become the
most interesting person in the world.
When you show curiosity and generosity, you
receive wonderful gifts.
When you live in gratitude, you live in abundance.
Go on, act on that impulse, reach out, tell your
story and listen to theirs.
I’d love to hear about how this worked for you in
your life!
Or the funny stories of how it didn’t!
Leave a comment here!
Best wishes and best stories
Lisa
This is simply a GREAT question. And it can give rise to deep, powerful self-reflection as well.
My answer is “sculptors.” Whether they know it or not, the people showing up in my life are sculptors because they are carving, or at the very least leaving an impression on me that is making me into a thing of beauty. No matter what happens in my relationships with others, I am changed and usually for the better. The love, the fun, the frustration, the anger, the differences, yes, mostly the distinct differences are what change me because I have to see the world in a different way, at least for a moment.
When I hear, “just let it go” and “don’t take it personally,” I know that is good advice on a social level, but I welcome sculptors in the big scheme of things. The people who show up in my life are all gifts.
Thanks Mia, I love this concept!
Lisa,
This piece certainly made me think. It felt relaxing and authentic. I look forward to receiving these stories. They always give me a lift and reach out to bring me a bit closer to reality.
My Best,
Davia
Thanks Davia, your support and attention is greatly appreciated!
Hi Lisa, First, I love the way you write a story. Second, I loved Mia’s response “sculptures”. Although I didn’t readily come up with an analogy, what did come to me was truly authentic people with purpose and high energy. Now what’s coming to me as I’m typing is dream makers and purpose pushers. All of the people that have come into my life lately have pushed me closer to my purpose and my dreams. Recently, I had similar experience like yours. I love and am gifted to dance, however had been lamenting about the time being passed (too seasoned) to share my gift. I felt I had to settle for making sure everything I did in business and life danced or was filled with the spirit of the dancer that I am. But the desire to actually dance would not leave me and I made a declaration in May that I would be a dancer. In July I attended an event I wasn’t even going to attend, where a professional dancer performed and it just so happened, (actually the energy of my desire, belief and declaration) that the dancer was in the bathroom by herself near the door like she had been placed there waiting for me to come in. I am not the social butterfly that talks to people but decided after a couple of awkward seconds to compliment her dance, invite her to an event of mine, and get her number so we could connect later. Amazingly, after a little over a month, we have collaborated and are in the final stages of putting together a dance workshop to incorporate into my program and a plan to put together a dance troupe of women my age for performances and the like! I am so excited and truly do believe in following your heart and speaking up when the situation dictates. Thank you and keep sharing your stories!
Sounds wonderful – what a great story….and what a fabulous outcome – love to hear how it develops! best wishes, Lisa