Don’t you hate it when the ‘gurus’ and ‘masters’ tell you stuff that you just don’t want to hear or simply don’t agree with?
I think it was Jim Rohn, the motivational speaker and wealth mentor who said ‘you are the average of the 5 people you spend most time with’. I have resisted this for years.
I mean, my kids don’t earn millions, my family members aren’t always spiritually aligned, some of my friends don’t even know what I do. So what, I’m supposed to dump them all?
Well, all that’s changed for me over the last few years.
It’s not that I want to dump people now…it’s just I’m really conscious of what feeds me and what poisons me and I try to be vigilant about what I let in.
What I’ve realized is that even when you have the very best mindset and the highest intentions, you can be trapped and sabotaged in so many ways! Here are the 4 worst scenarios that drain your energy and suck away your life (business) force –
- The Kid Comparison
You know the conversation, a few moms get together and start casually mentioning their kid’s ‘wins’. What starts as a nice little appreciation spree ends with you feeling like you’re the worst mom in the world because your kid isn’t getting top grades, a nationwide champion in judo or has 10 ‘close’ friends that sleep over EVERY weekend.
- The Entertaining Enigma
So, you get invited over for a ‘drinks’ and your hostess serves up a 5 course gourmet dinner with a smile and the comment ‘I just rustled up this snack’. You feel inadequate because the last meal you threw together for friends was pasta and salad with store bought ice-cream for desert!
- The Business Berate
You get together with your networking contacts and they talk about their nobel non-profits, ‘I couldn’t charge them for my services, who could?’ And you start feeling like your socially conscious projects just don’t cut the mark.
- The Family Feud
Celebrating your nephew’s half-birthday (who can wait to rejoice the sweet baby!) you get hammered for being a working mom AND for not sending you kids to childcare until 5pm each day. Yes, daring to suggest that flexibility and entrepreneurship can be a gift to your kids is considered blasphemous.
This is when you need conscious community with YOUR PEOPLE.
The people who know that you are a rockstar for everything you do – your business, your home, your kids, your energy.
A rockstar not despite all your messiness and mistakes, but because of them.
A rockstar for your heart and your soul.
A rockstar for your courage and your resilience.
This is when you’ve got to weed out the negativity and the people who just don’t get it.
And spend time and energy with the people who support you and all that you are.
So, who are the 5 people in your life that can do this for you?
If you can’t name them NOW – then you’ve got to get working on this.
Today, right now.
So, go on, share here who they are and while you’re doing that, let them know so they can feel how important they are for you.
I don’t have five in real life.
I can relate Stephanie, it’s taken time and intention to create a support network from my truest business vision – it’s not always the people closest to you that can provide the best support. Good luck and best wishes, Lisa
I am lucky to occasionally have 1 or 2 Rockstars in my life, people who understand the grind because they share it. My family is very supportive but does not have a clue into the business side of my need. When you are so focused on building business and doing business, building new relationships are critical but seem elusive. Any additional tips on finding mentors are greatly appreciated. P.S. You have become one of my newest virtual Rockstars 🙂
thanks Lorian!